A LETTER FROM YOUR BELLY FAT

  
Hi!

How's it goin'!

This is a letter from your ol' pal, your belly fat.

We sure had a great time this summer, didn't we? Lots of good
times, great food, and plain ol' sitting around eating and
drinking too much.

Well, I'm thinking about sticking around another year if you
don't mind? However you might need to get a bigger pair of
pants, as I was thinking about expanding my place down here.

But do me a favor, avoid that metabolic resistance training
that you were thinking of doing.

The last time you did that MRT stuff, I nearly had to look for a new
place to live. I felt like the Wicked Witch of the West in the land of
Oz. Did you hear me yelling, "Help me, I'm melting!"?

Instead, stick to that slow, useless cardio stuff. Sure I get a little
sweaty, and the ol' brain up there thinks it's doing "a real fat
burning workout", but it's never enough to melt me outta here.

Another thing, keep listening to those experts who say resistance
training doesn't burn body fat. Since research shows they're
wrong, if you added metabolic resistance training to your program,
you'd need to throw me a "going away belly fat" party.

After each one of those MRT workouts you tried last January, it
felt like someone lit a match under our collective butt. I was
burning up down here!

Boy oh boy, I sure was glad you gave that up and went back to just
lifting utensils and not dumbbells. Otherwise we wouldn't have been
able to celebrate another summer together this year. **Awww, hugz**

Sometimes I wonder, my ol' friend, what did you ever do in college
without me, your trusted belly fat?

Back then, you were probably one of those people that just couldn't
wait to get to the beach to show off your body, not like these days.

Nope, stay in the shade and keep the cover-up clothes on,
that's the way to go now. Besides, its a lot closer to the
cold beer and the BBQ when you're sitting in the shade
avoiding all the fun down on the beach.

Well it sure was good catching up with you. I'm sure we'll be in touch
more often, as long as you stay away from those MRT style workout
routines...Sounds hot. Too hot.

Brings a tear to my eye whenever I even think about that
workout program and all the belly fat it's burned. Heck, it's
fried more fat than a cook at a greasy breakfast joint.


Your friend and spare tire,

Belly Fat, your BF-BFF
(Belly Fat Best Friend Forever)

PS - Seriously, don't go near that MRT stuff

...unless you want to see me, Thunder Thighs, Manboobs, Jigg Lee
Arm Fat, and Luv Handles pack our bags and hit the highway.

It will be a sad farewell, and you'd be stuck with ripped abs, gorgeous
glutes, chiseled chest, and toned arms, and you know how much attention
those guys get from the opposite sex.

Who needs it, I say.